Clues, Humor and National Anthem Information - OurSports Central (press release)

Manatees fans, most of our staff will be in Capital Of Tennessee attending
Baseball Winter Meetings until Friday of adjacent week. Our concern offices will
be open, however, business minutes will be limited. We will be
back at full strength on Friday, the 7th.

Going back to hoarded wealth hunting...here's a couple hints to maintain you looking:

Number Two

If you're travelin' after tray

The Tropic headin' to northwest

Drawn out by DeLorme

88 prob'ly be yer the best.

Number Three
The figure be partly hidden now

By ornaments on th' wall

But th' figure ye'll happen somehow

Or the guard will do a call.

Many of you sent in some wit this week, so let's travel to the mail bag.

>From Texas:

I cognize the political commercial messages usually drive people nuts with the
mudslinging, but here's our ballot for the funniest presidential
commercial out there. Thank goodness person have a sense of humor:
http://www.break.com/index/chuck-norris-picks-a-candidate.html

>From Wisconsin:

Being that you're a Brewers Child League (Baseball) team, I wanted to
send you a Wisconsin River River (Cheesehead) diagnostic test to see if you and your staff
could relate.

Well, as a former Wisconsinite, I can nod my caput to most of the items
on the list, so yes, we'll forward them on to our readers for today's
laugh:

YOU might be A Wisconsinite WHEN:

1. Your thought of a traffic jam is 10 autos waiting to go through a tractor on
the highway.

2. "Vacation" intends going up North past times Hwy 8 for the weekend.

3. You measurement distance in hours.

4. You cognize respective people who have got hit cervid more than once.

5. You often switch over from "heat" to "A/C" inch the same twenty-four hours and back again.

6. Your whole household have on Packer Green to Christian church on Sunday.

7. You can drive 65 miles per hour through 2 feet of snowfall during a raging
blizzard, without flinching.

8. You see people wearing disguise at societal events (including
weddings and funerals ).

9. You put in security visible lights on your house and garage and go forth both
unlocked.

10. You believe of the major nutrient groupings as beer, fish, and venison.

11. You transport jumper cablegrams in your auto and your married woman or girlfriend
knows how to utilize them.

12. There are 7 empty autos running in the parking batch at Mill's Fleet
Farm or Menard's at any given time.

13. You designing your kid's Hallowe'En costume to suit over a snowsuit.

14. Drive is better in the wintertime because the chuckholes are filled
with snow.

15. You mention to the Packers as "we."

16. You cognize all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still wintertime and
road construction.

17. You can place a southern or eastern speech pattern as soon as the
person gets speaking.

18. You have got no job pronouncing Lac Du Flambeau.

19. You see Minneapolis exotic.

20. You cognize how to polka and also cognize it's the state dance.

21. Your thought of originative landscape gardening is a statue of a cervid next to
your bluish spruce.

22. You were unaware that there is a legal imbibing age.

23. Down South to you intends Illinois.

24. A terror is something you eat.

25. Your neighbour throws a political party to observe his new pole shed.

26. You travel out to fish Fry every Friday night. More often than not
it's roost or walleye.

27. Your 4th of July field day was moved indoors owed to frost.

28. You have got more than statute miles on your snowfall blower than your car.

29. You happen minus twenty grades "a small chilly."

30. You actually understand these jokes, and you forward them to all
your Wisconsin River friends.

More from the mail bag:

What make I have got to make to execute the National Anthem at one of your games?

Good question. In fact, Seth Thomas Bell, the Director of Florida
Operations for the American Capital Nationals, visited us yesterday and was
inquiring about National Anthem vocalists for Spring Training. If you
know of person that would wish to execute the National Anthem this
year before either a subjects Spring Training game or a Manatees
game, have got him or her contact Seth Thomas Bell (for the Nationals) at (321)
633-9200 x2018 or Kyle Ian Smith (Manatees) at (321) 633-9200 x3007. Of
course, games are limited and duty assignment of which games depends on
availability.

What was the trade with the National Anthem on Monday night?

I assumed you're refrring to MNF's rainfall game...In mention to the
National Anthem being cancelled at Monday's NFL game in Pittsburgh due
to atrocious weather condition jobs and already delaying the start of the
game, a few fans asked what we would've done. First, here's an
excerpt from the Associated Press:

PITTSBURGH -- Oh, state can't you sing?

With the kickoff already delayed 25 proceedings by awful weather, and a
stadium filled with rain-drenched fans growing impatient for the
opening kickoff, the NFL skipped the national anthem before Monday
night's Dolphins-Steelers game. Every game in the four major American
pro athletics conferences traditionally begins with the anthem. But the NFL
rushed to begin the game because of the declining weather condition and
field conditions. The delayed start occurred after the teams' pregame
warm ups were close down because of lightning and heavy rain, a rarely
seen combination in Pittsburgh in late November. Players were not
allowed back onto the field and fans could not go back to their lower
level seating until nine proceedings before the 8:55 p.m. kickoff. Steelers
president Art Rooney two said the squad now wishes the anthem had been
played.

"Due to the weather condition statuses that delayed the kickoff of our Monday
night football game game, a last-second decision was made to waive the
national anthem prior to kickoff," Rooney said in a statement issued
by the team. "In retrospect, the determination to call off the national
anthem was one that we regret. We apologise to our fans who attended
the game and pledge that it is a state of affairs that we trust will never
happen again."

Did you see the cardinal word above: traditionally.

Some people believe it's a law to get with the National Anthem, when
in fact the tradition didn't get until World War II.

I'm as loyal as the adjacent guy, but I'm torn about the National
Anthem. It's a British song that's sol hard to sing correctly
that most of us would never have got the nervus to acquire up in presence of the
crowd and execute it, including myself. Any volunteers? Call Thomas
Bell or Kyle Smith, their Numbers are listed above.

And yet baseball game is the most traditional athletics and tradition being
what it is, fans would travel nuts if it wasn't performed before every
game. However, I'm a larger fan of everybody reciting the Pledge of
Allegiance in stead of the National Anthem. Why? Because it's a
sacred vow. When you acquire married you don't hum the wedding ceremony march
because it's a song, you take a vow. When the President is sworn into
office he doesn't sing 'Hail to the Chief,' he takes a vow, an curse of
office. When you attest in tribunal you don't sing the Law and Order
theme song, you're sworn in with your manus on a Bible! An curse or
pledge is your direct testament and people justice you on your word, not
your ability to subscribe a song with a crowd.

I cognize everybody would recite the Pledge of Allegiance, but most
people make not sing along to the National Anthem because as singers,
well, we're horrible. C'mon, the first measure to recovery is
acknowledgment, like in my Classic Rock Music Addicts class: "My name
is Vaulting Horse Roentgen and I couldn't transport a melody if I had a forklift." There I
said it and I'm not emabarrassed. Join me, you too, can acknowledge you
can't sing and sooner or later person will acquire a motion started
where we can actually just recite the pledge and then have got a child yell,
"Play Ball!"

I'm not signing up for vocalizing lessons anytime soon, but I wouldn't
hesitate a 2nd every nighttime to travel to place plate and Pb the crowd
in the Pledge of Commitment and I cognize most of you wouldn't either.

Now, back to that rain-soaked nighttime in Pittsburgh. You asked, so here
goes: The field was already soaked and it wasn't going to acquire any
better. If you're going to play a three hr game, what's the big
deal over two more than minutes? The National Anthem takes between 1:23
and 1:28 to execute and you can run the performing artist on and off the field
in another 15 secs each way. If the NFL takes television time-outs
they really aren't concerned with clip or the field getting soaked
anyway, are they? There are millions of television dollars at stake, rainfall or
not. I would've had the anthem played, even if it meant the
computerized Chink FX version that every bowl have installed. I
wouln't have got tried to sing along, because I can't sing, but I would've
played it.

And lastly, the greatest peeve from every squad in America, and I mean
every sporting squad or particular event that is held is this: with
perfomring the National Anthem come ups the fact that there are those
that rehearse it one manner and then execute the drawn-out dance remix,
filthy shekels version at show clip knowing there is nil we can do
to halt them short of cutting off powerfulness to their microphones. I have
no musical ability, but I cringe when person crying it up. Especially when they believe they're on American Idol and that everybody
will love the flair.

I believe the National Athem should be played at ceremonials and held in
the peak regard, and only performed by those that understand the
meaning of the song and sing it the manner it was supposed to be sung. Forceful. Powerful.

Not personalized.

Here's a hint for those that execute the anthem: Cipher wishes it
trashed, so understand that the public presentation is not an hearing for
Simon, Paula and Randy. Just make it right. Remember Roseanne Barr's
performance in San Diego? Yeah...that's not something you want
following you if you're trying to hammer yourself a vocalizing career.

Three simple words: Pledge of Allegiance.

Next letter.

What's the position of the 2008 schedule?

It's done, approved, have been signed off upon and the conference has
granted permission to all squad to let go of it; we are sending it out to
the local mass media mercantile establishments today. The people in New York that tally baseball's
websites will have got it posted on our web land site very shortly. Those that
want a pdf version of our agenda emailed to them can direct an email
to info@spacecoaststadium.com. In the topic line type the word
SCHEDULE in working capital letters and we'll hit it right back to you.

What make I necessitate to make to acquire my boy to be a Bat Boy?

We will carry on Bat Boy/Girl trials after the first of the year. Bat
Boys/Girls must be 14 old age of age, absolutely no exclusion to that
rule! Parents must supply a birth certification and transcripts will be
forwarded up the nutrient concatenation from squads to the League Office, etc. We
will have got got six Bat Boys/Girls this season so they can have clip off for
a personal life, household vacations, etc. We will denote a meeting
date for a Saturday in January in a hereafter newsletter, so delight pass
this information along to interested parties. It travels without
explaining that those people considering applying should not sign
up for springtime or summertime young person sports.

I have got some 2006 ST photographs taken at SCS: Nationals volts Orioles. Can
they be entered?

All photographs entered in our photograph competition must be Manatees-oriented
photos. The photographs can be taken anywhere as long as the topics are
wearing some sort of Manatees gear, or, they can be taken at a
Manatees game.

Can we electronic mail you to clear up a clue?

Hey, we answered all the humorour letters above. Just kidding. Absolutely, you can electronic mail us regarding clues. We will not give out
any other information, however, based on a hint we will clear up some
points that we experience demand explaining, especially if there is a safety
issue involved. In one of our former hoarded wealth runs I had one guy
email me asking on which buoy on the Indian River he should search. Now the coin was no where close a buoy and wasn't located anywhere you
needed a boat to reach, and at that point I informed the individual
that the coin wasn't on the river. We certainly didn't desire this guy
paddling or rowing out on a river all hours of the nighttime looking for a
coin, risking his safety. I didn't state him anything more, such as as he
was looking 20 statute miles away from the coin or anything that would be
helpful But be very clear with your requests. Our response to you
will be to only clear up a clue; you won't have any other help, so
be prepared for a very short reply without a batch of explanation.

We got Edward Kendall from the Cubs? What's up with that?

Ah, I like the usage of 'we,' which means, according to govern #15 the
Wisconsin thing above, that you're a true Cheesehead. I don't follow
all of the trades and minutes as closely as many of you do, but I
will state this: trust the Brewers scouting department. There's a guy
up in Milwaukee named Jack Zduriencik that have done his prep and
time and again he's been The Man. Jack's batting norm is pretty
darn good when it come ups to determination the right players.

On a side note, the Brewers also picked up Guillermo Mota. Mota used
to be a shortstop in the Mets organisation back in the 90s. He was
Plan V'd over to the Montreal Expos in December 96, I think, and was
converted to a pitcher. He wishes adust caramel/chocolate/coconut bars
on his off years while charting pitches in the stands. I cognize this
because in 1997 he mooched a pan of them on a regular footing from one
of our twenty-four hours of game employees in Fayetteville, NC. He liked her
cooking so much that he actually proposed to the college-aged woman. She turned him down because she wanted to complete college. I don't
know if she's kicking herself in the butt end for that, but he drop madly
in love with her and her cooking. I won't uncover her name but she
knows who she is. If she's reading this, direct the formula and we'll
include it in a hereafter newsletter.

Last comment, from the comic across the hall: How much Mountain Dew
did you imbibe today?

Too much.

We'll direct the adjacent electronic mail newsletter out from the Opryland Hotel with
an update from the Winter Meetings sometime adjacent week.

That's it for today. Rich Person a good weekend, everybody.

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The sentiments expressed in this release are those of the organisation issuing it, and make not necessarily reflect the ideas or sentiments of OurSports Central or its staff.

Win a Stand Up Comedy Talent Show

If you believe you are amusing and good at telling jokes, you could win a base up comedy endowment show. What's the first two of import ways to win:

1. Get an enactment that includes jokes, not just a twine of jokes

2. Rehearse, rehearse and rehearse

People are much more than willing to listen to a narrative than a joke. The narrative could be that old 1 that gets 'As I was coming to the club/pub/theater tonight....' but don't begin with those words.

Or it could be about something that happened to you on vacation, when you got stopped for speeding, when your mother-in-law came to visit, or whatever. The narrative necessitates to be full of jokes, but you can maintain the laughter coming.

Record your rehearsals

How make you rehearse? In presence of a mirror, while recording - preferably with the same kind of microphone you will have got on stage. That manner you acquire used to the mike, and you will larn what do the sound degree alter. If you desire to make it more than realistic, acquire some very powerful visible lights and set them where they indicate at you - just like being on stage.

How do you stand up out? Well., you can make a batch worse than wear some odd clothing - you are there to be amusing so why not look funny? You can also gesture in an odd manner or walk in an odd way. Bash something different - but do certain that your gags work.

You also necessitate a few fast ones of the trade to acquire your enactment going, and some aid with timing. I urge you confer with an expert for this, and one of the best I cognize are the Stand-up Comedy Fast Begin Usher and the Comedy Timing Secrets. Get this and you will have got a caput begin on the competition, and could well start a new calling by winning a Stand up Comedy Endowment Show.

Pink - Like the Color

Yep, that's my last name - Pink. Let me add that it's my married last name.

When I first met my husband, we were on our first date. He mentioned that I hadn't even asked his last name yet. He said it was a color. I sarcastically said, "Fuschia". Little did I know I was so close...

When we got engaged, people that I worked with would just laugh when they found out my last name was going to be Pink. One guy even came up with a great joke:

"What nationality is Pink?" (I know you are dying to know this one....)

"Crayola"

Ha ha.....Actually, when I ask my husband what nationality it is, he has no idea. I am guessing it's short for something like Pinkowski or something and when his family came to Elis Island, someone just shortened it.

As we approached our wedding day, I tried to talk my husband into taking my last name. I thought he would be thrilled. I mean, how manly is the last name "Pink"??? He wasn't having it. My sister-in-law told me that was one of the best things about getting married - losing the last name of "Pink".

I asked him if he got made fun of a lot as a kid with that last name. All he would say was that he spent a lot of time in the Principal's office. Go figure....

After we were married, I wouldn't wear ANYTHING pink. I hated the color.

We are easy to find in the phone book. You can imagine that there aren't a whole lot of other "Pinks" in the area.

What is most annoying is that when you tell someone that's your last name, they ask how to spell that. They think that there is some trick or something. Yeah, there's a "z" in there, but we don't pronounce that. To make things easier, when I tell someone my last name, I just automatically say, "like the color". People at work laugh when they overhear me saying that, but it's really just easier.

We have been married for 6 years now and have 2 girls (thank goodness). I now embrace the last name of "Pink". I love it. Even my husband appreciates it more now. We are going to get bowling balls for our league and he has mentioned getting a pink one too.

In closing, yes, my last name is Pink....Like the color.....